Dear Caffeine,We can't go on like this. I have fun when I'm with you and you make me feel alive, but I'm losing sleep and being on this energy roller coaster is taking its toll on me. I should have never initiated this relationship with you. For all those years, you were around in the background, but I didn't see what others saw in you. And then I distanced myself from you for a good 18 months after Turtle was born. After that, I should have just stayed away. But you tempted me with morning clarity and late night productivity and you knew just how to pull me out of that 4 pm slump. Hanging out once or twice a week became stealing visits with you multiple times a day. And now I'm stuck in this cycle of rendezvous, guilt, fatigue, breaking away for a few days and then crawling back in desperation after a few nights of lost sleep and the realization that no one can make me feel just like you do. Somehow I can already see that this will be one of those long complex break ups and that you aren't going to help me by letting me go. But I hope you care about me enough to realize that I need to cut you off, that it's the best thing for me. And I know you'll find someone else. There are plenty of other sleep deprived overworked moms out there.
I'll never forget the good times!
Farewell,
Chelsea
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2 comments:
I hear you, and I'm here for you. Caffeine and I have broken up many times over the years and we somehow find ourselves back together. Be strong.
Still, now that I'm in a long-term relationship with wine, the ups and downs with caffeine are easier to take. I'm sure there's a healthier solution than cutting my caffeine tweaks with alcohol, but it probably requires effort or sacrifice.
Nice to hear from someone who's been there and...is still there. Gives me hope! ; )
I've recently started flirting more with wine, but it's not a committed relationship yet. Don't have any effort or sacrifice left to spare, so I'll most likely end up in the same menage a trois as you.
I wonder how many more of us are out there?
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